


Year by Year

by AGJ1990



Series: Evelyn Winchester [11]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: Gen, Winchester!Sister
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-08-29
Updated: 2017-08-29
Packaged: 2018-12-21 06:29:32
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 26
Words: 17,230
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11938284
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AGJ1990/pseuds/AGJ1990
Summary: A collection of snippets, one from each year of Evy's life.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> The characters of Supernatural do not belong to me. The original character of Evelyn Winchester does.

John was lost. Two-week-old Evy had been screaming for a straight hour. John needed sleep, and he needed it now. He was losing patience with a baby. He could handle fighting any monster, but apparently couldn’t figure out how to soothe a little baby. Just as John was about to put her down and just let her cry, he heard a voice from the doorway.  
“Can I try, dad?”  
Ten-year-old Sammy was watching him. He was in his PJs, his eyes drooping from lack of sleep. Great. Two kids not sleeping. But John was desperate, and Sam had shown that he was good at comforting Evy ever since she’d left the hospital. So he gratefully walked over and placed Evy in Sam’s arms. John watched, amazed, as Sam immediately went to work.  
“Shhh. It’s okay, baby. I know you’re scared.” Evy’s screams immediately died down to a small whimper. “I know you miss your mommy. But you’ll see her again one day. Now what’s wrong?”   
Little Evy seemed to calm more and more with Sam’s words.   
“Shhh. It’s okay.” Sam continued, lifting the tiny crying infant onto his shoulder. He bounced her up and down slightly. “Everything’s okay.”  
Less than five minutes later, Evy was sleeping contentedly in Sam’s arms. Sam mouthed a good night to his father then started to head to his room. John watched them go, but stopped Sammy just before he was out of sight.   
“Sam?”   
“Yeah, dad?” Sam turned and whispered, careful not to wake up the now sleeping Evy.  
“Thank you, son.”  
Sam smiled and nodded, then turned and went back to his room. He passed the crib Evy had been sleeping in, knowing if he laid her down she would just wake up again in a few minutes. He laid down on the bed, placing Evy exactly halfway between him and the edge. It was fairly warm inside the house, so Sam decided she didn’t need her baby blanket. He rubbed her stomach a little and whispered,  
“It’s okay, baby. I’m here. I’ll always be here for you.” He leaned over and kissed her forehead. “Goodnight baby. Sammy loves you.”


	2. 1 Year Old

“Come on, Dad! It’s time!”  
John groaned. “Sam, why are you so set on your sister having a birthday party? She won’t remember it!”  
“Yeah, but we will.” Sam said. “Dad, come on. It’ll only take a minute. Please?”  
John stopped himself from laughing. Sam was more excited than Evy would have been if she’d known what exactly was going on. So John stood up and followed Sam into Bobby’s kitchen. There was a big birthday banner hanging up above the stove. Evy sat in her high chair, grinning and giggling as Dean ducked just out of her eyesight for a few seconds, then jumped back in front of her with a “boo!” Bobby was placing a candle on a somewhat sloppily made chocolate birthday cake. As Bobby lit the candle, Sam placed a kiss on Evy’s cheek and took the cake carefully over to her.  
“Happy birthday to you…”   
John found himself smiling as they finished singing to her and Sam demonstrated how to blow out her birthday candle. Evy paid very close attention to Sam’s instructions. She tried hard to mimic him, but it wasn’t working. Finally, Sam stood just behind her. He blew at the same time she did, and when the candle was finally blown out, Sam praised her as if she’d just found the cure for cancer. Evy giggled, then waited rather impatiently as Bobby cut her a piece of birthday cake. John started to turn and go back to his research when he heard Evy yell for him.  
“Daddy!”   
John turned back around and nearly wept. Evy had a fistful of birthday cake in her hand and was holding it out to him. She held up her other arm, waving him over to come and pick her up. John obliged, pulling her out of the high chair and propping her up on his hip. Evy attempted to give him the cake in her fist, but missed and ended up smearing it down the side of his face. Sam waited with baited breath; John was sometimes very impatient with Evy, and when she did things like that, he tended to turn and run. But when Evy started giggling, Sam was pleasantly surprised that John did too.   
“You are quite the silly one, aren’t you?” John asked.  
Evy reached up with her hand and pulled some of the smeared birthday cake from her father’s face off. She put it in her own mouth, making John laugh even harder. He hugged Evy close, then finally the tears he’d been fighting started to slip out. She wrapped her arms around his neck, kissing his scratchy beard and muttering,  
“Love daddy.”   
“I love you too, little one.” John answered. “Happy birthday, my sweet girl.”


	3. 2 Years Old

Sam felt like he’d gotten hit by a dump truck. He had a headache, a fever, and he couldn’t breathe. He couldn’t stop coughing and sneezing. He’d been sick for only two days, but it felt like a month. Just as he was about to try to go to sleep again, he heard a knock at his door. He groaned but called,  
“Come in.”   
Two-year-old Evy walked in, carrying a box in her arms that was almost too big for her. As sick as he was, Sam sat up and watched her come over, intrigued.   
“What are you doing, Cricket?”   
“I got you pwesent, Sammy.” She said.  
“You did?” Sam asked.  
“Yeah.” Evy held up the box for him to take. “Here, Sammy.”  
Sam took the box from her, and was surprised to find it felt almost empty. “Thanks, Cricket.” He said, and started to open it.  
“Sammy, wait!” Evy said, dramatically throwing her hands on her hips. “You gotta wait for me.”  
“Oh.” Sam tried to laugh at her mini-tantrum, though it came out as a wet cough instead. “Sorry. You need help?”   
“No. I can do it.” She said.  
Sam watched breathlessly as she climbed onto the bed next to him. He relaxed when she was finally on the bed safely, and waited patiently as she crawled up to sit next to him.   
“Cricket.” He said. “I don’t want you to stay too long, okay?”  
Sam immediately wanted to kick his own butt for his poor choice of words when Evy’s bottom lip stuck out and started trembling. “You not want me here?” she asked, her eyes filling with devastated tears.   
“Honey, no, I’m sorry, that’s not what I meant.” Sam said, though he had to turn his head away from her when he started to cough again. “I just don’t want you to get sick too.”  
“I stay, Sammy.” Evy declared. “You stay wif me when I sick.”  
Sam sighed and shook his head. Evy was one of the sweetest children he’d ever met. But she had, as Bobby had once put it, “a stubborn streak that could put your daddy to shame.” So Sam decided to stop trying. If she got sick, he’d just take care of her like she’d said.   
“Alright, Cricket. Fine. You can stay.” He said, ruffling her hair.   
Evy waited for a moment, looking at him expectantly. “Open you pwesent, Sammy!” she said impatiently, pushing the box towards him.  
“Oh, right.” Sam said. He opened the box and was surprised to find the reason why it felt so empty. It was. “Umm, Cricket?” he asked. “Did you forget something?”   
Evy giggled. “No, Sammy. That’s your present. You like it?” she asked.  
“Cricket…” Sam said, confused. “It’s empty.”  
Evy’s face fell. “It not empty, Sammy.” She said. She took the box from him and set it in front of her. “They kisses.”   
“Kisses?” Sam asked.  
“Yeah.” Evy said. “I put kisses in there. When you get sad, you take one out. Then you feel better.” She reached into the box, pulled her hand back out as if she was holding something, and placed it on Sam’s cheek. When he smiled, she grinned. “See? It working.”  
“Come here.” Sam said, embracing her. “I love it. And I love you.”   
“Love you too, Sammy.”   
THREE DAYS LATER  
“Sabby!”  
Sam walked into the room where Evy was supposed to be sleeping. She had inherited his cold, just as he’d been afraid she would. He sat on the edge of her bed, feeling useless at seeing her so sick and not being able to do anything about it.  
“What’s wrong, Cricket?” he asked.  
“Can’t seep.” Evy said. Her nose was so congested that she was breathing through her mouth. “I ‘on’t feel good.”   
“I know, baby.” Sam said, rubbing her back. “I’m so sorry I got you sick.”  
“Is okay, Sabby.” Evy said. “You stay here wiff me?”   
“You bet I will.” Sam said. “And I have a present for you.”   
“What it?” Evy asked.  
Sam leaned down and kissed her cheek tenderly.  
Evy smiled. “Thank you, Sabby.”   
“Anytime, Cricket. Anytime.”


	4. 3 Years Old

Not a lot of things could distract Dean Winchester from talking to a pretty girl, but the ear piercing cry of his little sister could. The sun was just beginning to go down, and Dean had taken Sam and Evy out into town to watch them. Their dad John was sleeping in a motel room a few blocks away, having just returned from a long hunt. He’d been surprisingly willing to let them go downtown for the fourth of July celebration, especially since Evy was quite restless. Dean turned and looked around, then saw, a few feet away, Evy sprawled on the ground and Sam hovering above her. Dean immediately ran to them.  
“What happened?” he asked.  
Evy pushed herself up and held her arms out to Dean to be picked up. The first thing Dean noticed was her knees. They were both scraped. One of them was normal, but the other one had some layers of skin missing. She was also scraped just above her eye, and Dean could see a bruise starting to form there.   
“Deanie….” Evy sobbed, and Dean was shaken out of his shock. He reached down and picked her up, cradling her close to him as he started to walk back to the Impala.   
“Sam!” Dean snapped. “What happened?”  
Sam shook his head. “Uh, she fell. I was giving her a piggyback ride and she fell off my shoulders.”  
Dean opened the backdoor of the Impala and climbed in, pulling Evy up with him. He had figured it was an accident, and was relieved that Evy wasn’t hurt worse. Sam opened the driver’s side door and reached under the seat, pulling out the first aid kit. Dean pulled Evy around so he could patch her up. She continued to sniffle, but tried to be brave as Dean fixed her knees and her face. She winced a little as he applied the disinfectant, but otherwise stayed quiet. Sam stood by, watching as Dean fixed her up; he was almost as upset as Evy. Dean finished cleaning Evy up, and was relieved to see she had finally stopped crying. Dean wiped her face and asked,  
“That feel better, kiddo?”   
A still teary eyed Evy, who now had two fingers in her mouth but had stopped crying, shook her head.  
“No, it doesn’t?” Dean asked, confused.   
“Not yet.” Evy said. She pointed at her knee, then back up at Dean expectantly.  
It took a second, but Dean finally got the message. Smiling, he asked, “You want me to kiss it better?”   
Evy smiled. “Yes, please.”   
Dean happily obliged, kissing both her knees and her face quickly. “How’s that?”   
Evy turned to Sam. “Sammy?”   
“Yeah, baby?”   
“You kiss it too?” she asked. “It won’t get better without both of you.”  
Sam moved towards her and gingerly kissed all three injuries. Evy smiled, jumping off Dean’s knee excitedly. She went to take Sam’s hand as Dean wrapped up the first aid kit, but Sam backed away. Evy’s eyes started swimming with tears again.   
“Sammy?”   
Dean turned around and watched them. He walked up to Evy and quietly told her to wait for them. He went to Sam and pulled him aside.  
“What’s wrong?” he asked.  
“She was on my shoulders when she got hurt, Dean.” Sam said.  
“Sammy, it was an accident.” Dean said. “She’s fine. And it’s you she wants, not me.”   
Sam nodded, then walked over to a still waiting Evy, who leaned against the Impala. Sam bent down in front of her, the sight of her patched up knees and face making his heart hurt. He took both her hands in his.  
“I’m so sorry, Cricket.”  
“I okay, Sammy.” Evy assured him. “It was an accident.”   
Sam smiled and hugged her. It didn’t surprise him at all that she was trying to make him feel better when she was the one that had just gotten hurt. Evy waited as patiently as a three-year-old could, then asked,   
“Sammy? Can we go back and play now?”   
Sam chuckled. “Sure, Cricket. I got to tell you something first though.”   
Evy broke out of the hug and looked him in the eye. “What is it?” she asked.  
“Sammy loves you.” Sam said.  
Evy grinned and hugged him again. “Love you too, Sammy.”


	5. 4 Years Old

“Please. I just want to go home!”   
“You’re never going home.” The demon said again.   
A sniffling Evy clutched her stuffed cat to her chest. “I want my Sammy.” She said as a tear slipped down her cheek.   
The demon groaned. “I’m so sick of your whining. It’s no wonder your family let us take you.”   
“That’s not true.” Evy said, though she was beginning to doubt her own assurances.   
It had only been a few hours since she’d been taken by the demon, though to four-year-old Evy, it felt like days. She’d been sleeping in the motel room, where Daddy, Sammy, and Dean were discussing the monster they were hunting. The next thing she knew, she was sitting in a small cell, water thrown in her face by an unfamiliar man who informed her that as long as she did what she was told she wouldn’t get hurt.  
“Think whatever you want, kid.” The evil man said.   
“Why’d you take me?” Evy asked. She was trying to be brave.   
“Because I enjoy your company.” The demon said. “Now shut up and stop whining.”  
“What if I don’t?” Evy said, trying to mimic Dean.  
“That’s it.”   
The demon suddenly reached his hand inside the bars. He concentrated for a few moments, and Evy felt Squish being pulled away from her. She tried to keep a tight hold on him, but it was impossible.  
“NO!” she screamed. “No, please! Squish!”  
Suddenly, Squish was in the hands of the demon, who easily ripped the battered cat into two pieces. He seemed to ponder ripping him up some more, but was satisfied when Evy started sobbing at the sight of her broken best friend. He dropped Squish onto the floor, then walked out of the room, laughing. A devastated Evy walked up to Squish’s remains, gathering them into her arms and cradling them.  
“Cricket!” Sam called when Evy started crying in her sleep. “Cricket, wake up!”   
Evy only cried harder.   
“Cricket! Baby, come on, please wake up!”   
Evy suddenly sat up in bed, startled awake by Sam’s shaking her. She realized she was not still in the cell, being held by the demon; she was at Bobby’s house, sleeping in his guest room. It was Sam sleeping beside her, not the demon. She reached for Squish to hold him, then remembered why he wasn’t there and started crying even harder. Sam grabbed her and held her tight, and Evy just sobbed into his shoulder. Sam tried to reassure her she was okay, that it was just a dream, that she was safe now. But his whole world in the last twenty-four hours had been turned upside down. He had not completely lost the pit that he’d had in his stomach when they’d discovered Evy missing.   
“You’re safe baby.” Sam said. “It’s okay, you’re safe.”   
“Sammy.” She said mournfully, tightening her hold on his neck. “I want Squish.”   
“I know, sweetie.” Sam said. “I know.”  
“Hey, baby girl.”   
Sam and Evy looked in the doorway. Dean stood there, holding one hand behind his back and grinning. Evy watched him, keeping her head on Sam’s shoulder. Dean moved towards her slowly, bending down in front of her and placing one hand on her arm.   
“I’ve got a surprise for you.” Dean said gently.  
Evy sniffed. “What is it?” she asked, breath hitching in her chest.  
Dean pulled his arm out, and Evy gasped. He handed her a stitched up Squish. Evy took him from Dean, turning him over in her hands. Dean had wrapped a piece of gauze around his middle, but otherwise Squish looked the same.  
“You fixed him!” Evy said, smiling for the first time since she’d gotten back to them.   
“Yep.” Dean said. “He just needed some stitching up.”   
Evy climbed off Sam’s lap and grabbed Dean around the neck. Dean embraced her, the thought of her smile from a few seconds ago making his heart flutter in his chest. He hated the fact that she was just as aware of the supernatural at four years old as he had been, so he savored the moments like this when he got to put a smile on her face. He felt Evy kiss his cheek.  
“Thank you, Deanie.”  
“You’re welcome, baby girl.” Dean said, holding her and rocking her slightly. “Anything for you.”   
Evy pulled away from Dean and looked at her brothers sadly. She knew she was safe with them now, but she was afraid of another nightmare. She wrapped one arm around Squish and asked,  
“Will you both sleep with me?”  
“Sure thing, baby girl.” Dean said.   
He climbed into bed beside Evy, and Sam scooted over, so that he was on one side of the bed, Dean on the other, and Evy was nestled between them. Sam laid back down, and wrapped both arms around her. Evy’s thumb slipped into her mouth, something she hadn’t done in months. Sam, who had patiently broken her of the habit by silently pulling her thumb out of her mouth when she did it, said nothing, just kissed the top of her head and watched her for a moment. Evy was soon in a deep, peaceful sleep.  
“Good night, Cricket.” Sam whispered. “We love you.”


	6. 5 Years Old

“Sammy.”   
Sam stirred but didn’t wake up.  
“Sammy. Sammy, get awake, please.”   
Sam sat up quickly, unsure who it was who was shaking him awake. He relaxed whne he saw it was just Evy standing next to his bed. He checked the clock on the table and groaned. It was 1:00am, and Sam had been sleeping less than an hour.   
“Cricket, what is it?” Sam asked.  
“Sammy, is Santa real?”   
“What?” Sam sat up in bed and saw that she’d been crying. “Come here, Cricket.”  
Evy climbed up onto the bed and next to her brother. Sam knew she hadn’t had a nightmare; she could never wake herself up from those. Once she was on the bed next to him, nestled in the crook of his arm, Sam told her,  
“Of course Santa’s real. Why would you think he wasn’t?”   
“I got up to go to the bathroom and I heard daddy telling uncle Bobby he was gonna tell me the truth about Santa.” Evy said. “What was he talking about?”   
Sam bit his lip to stop himself from yelling for John. He knew he needed to answer Evy somehow, but he wasn’t quite sure what to say yet. Evy waited patiently, and when Sam finally did open his eyes, he figured out what to say.  
“What daddy was going to tell you, Cricket, is that Santa is still coming but he might be late.”   
“Late?” Evy asked. “Why?”  
“Well…” Sam said, being careful not to speak too quickly because he was, in fact, making this up as he went along. “Santa called daddy from the North Pole earlier today. His sleigh broke down and it might take a couple days to fix it.”  
“He’s still coming, though, right?” Evy asked.  
“Yes.” Sam assured her. “He’s still coming.”  
“Promise?”   
“Yes, Cricket.” Sam said, kissing the top of her head. “I promise.”  
Evy relaxed under Sam’s arm and smiled. “Okay, Sammy.”   
“Okay, sweetie.” Sam said, relieved to have avoided what could have been a quite tearful night. “You ready to go back to sleep?”   
Evy yawned and nodded.  
“Come on. I’ll put you back to bed.” Sam said. Evy made a little whimpering noise, then wrapped both her arms around Sam’s waist and buried herself into his side. Sam laughed and asked, “Do you want to sleep with me?”   
Evy was wrapped so tightly around Sam that when she looked up into his face, her chin still rested against Sam’s chest. “Yes, please.” She said, then grinned.  
Sam laughed and shook his head. “Why can’t I ever say no to you?”   
“Cause you love me too much.” Evy replied.  
“You got that right.” Sam said. “Goodnight, Cricket. Sammy loves you.”   
Evy was already settling down. “Goodnight, Sammy.” She said as she yawned. “Love you too.”


	7. 6 Years Old

Sam walked into the small house, six year old Evy right behind him. She had been unnaturally quiet the entire walk home. When Sam had closed the door, he saw that Evy had seated herself on the couch and was looking quite downcast. Sam sat next to her on the couch, grabbed her chin gently and made her look at him.   
“Talk to me.” He said. “Why are you so sad?”   
Evy frowned and explained slowly, “We’re supposed to tell stories about our moms in school tomorrow.”   
“I see.” Sam said.   
“I don’t know what to say.” Evy explained. “I don’t remember anything about mommy.”  
“Well…” Sam said, pulling her over so she was in his lap, “I can help you with that. What do you want to know?”  
“Anything.” Evy insisted.  
“Okay.” Sam said, searching his brain for something unique to tell her. “You know what your mom loved more than anything else in the world?”   
“What?” Evy asked.  
“Balloons.”   
Sam’s unusual answer was enough to stop the unshed tears that were threatening to fall from Evy’s eyes. “Balloons?”  
Sam smiled. “Yep. Balloons. There was always at least a few in the house. She said that no matter how sad you felt, when you looked at a balloon, it made you feel better.” Before Evy could respond, another thought occurred to Sam. “Today would’ve been your mom’s birthday.”   
“Really?”   
Sam nodded, and got an idea. “Hey, Cricket? You want to do something for your mom’s birthday?”  
“Do what?” She asked.  
“Come on.” Sam urged, putting Evy down and standing up. He reached for her hand.  
“Where we going, Sammy?” she asked.  
“You’ll see.” Sam answered, grinning.  
Sam led her outside and down the street towards the small convenience store on the corner. He paid for a small bag of twenty mixed balloons and some string, then took Evy by the hand and back home. Evy was eager to help, so Sam allowed her, under his supervision, to cut twenty equal pieces of string. Soon, the kitchen of the small house was covered in different colored balloons. Sam gathered them up and tied them around one wrist, and grabbed Evy’s hand with the other.   
“Sammy?” she asked, giggling. “What are we doing?”   
“Hold on a minute.” Sam said. He let go of Evy’s hand and crouched down on his knee, pulling Evy close to him. “We are going to give these to your mom for her birthday.”  
“How do we do that?” Evy asked.  
“In a minute, I’m gonna give these to you.” Sam explained. “Hold on to them tight until I tell you to let them go, okay?”   
“Okay, Sammy.” Evy said. “What then?”   
“Then, they’re going to float up to your mom.” Sam said.  
“In heaven?” Evy asked.  
Sam nodded. “Yep. In heaven.”   
Evy grinned. “Okay.”  
Sam carefully placed all the balloons into Evy’s small hand, reminding her gently to “hold on tight”. Sam picked her up and planted her on his hip. Evy took her job seriously, gripping the balloons with a fierceness that Sam had never seen before. Sam nearly laughed when he saw that her tongue was sticking out, concentrating. Once Evy was securely in place, Sam said,  
“Okay, on three. One, two, three!”   
Once Sam said three, Evy released the balloons and muttered “wow” under her breath. Red, green, blue, and yellow balloons flew in every direction, and Evy’s little eyes darted all around, trying to watch all of them. When the balloons were nearly out of sight, Evy whispered,  
“Happy birthday, mommy.”   
Sam smiled and kissed Evy’s cheek. It killed him sometimes that Evy couldn’t remember her mother while he could. Sam had hoped while Missy was alive that, after Evy was born, they could go to a halfway normal life, like he’d always wanted. In the year she’d been with them, Sam had gone to the same school and lived in the same house. She’d taken care of him like he was her own son. After she’d died, John had gone back to the same lifestyle he’d dragged Sam through before. Had it not been for helping to take care of Evy, Sam was certain he would have lost himself in despair. Suddenly Evy gasped.  
“Look, Sammy!”   
Sam looked up in the direction Evy was pointing. A shooting star was passing by.  
“Look! It’s mommy, Sammy. She’s waving to us!”  
Sam laughed and pulled Evy in for a hug. “She sure is, baby. She’s telling you she loves you.”  
Evy looked back up towards the sky. “I love you too, mommy.”  
Sam soon brought Evy back into the house. Evy worked on her homework while Sam made dinner, they played a little, then Evy was given a bath and put to bed. After Evy was tucked in, she had one more question for Sam.  
“Sammy? Do you think mommy’s sad up there all by herself?”   
“What do you mean, Cricket?” Sam asked.  
“Up there in heaven without us.” Evy said. “She’s all by herself.”  
“Well, I don’t think she is.” Sam answered. “I think she’s your guardian angel. She keeps you safe and watches out for you.”   
“Really?” Evy asked.  
“Really.” Sam said. “How do you think she knew to wave at you after we sent the balloons up?”   
Evy grinned. “You’re right.”   
“Time to go to sleep, Cricket.” Sam stood up and kissed her forehead. “Good night, sweet girl. Sammy loves you.”   
“Love you too.” Evy said, already yawning and starting to drift to sleep.


	8. 7 Years Old

Note: The italics aren't working, so I don't know how clear this is, but the word 'hick' hear is meant to be the sound made when you have the hiccups.  
Hick.  
Hick.  
“You okay there, Cricket?” Sam asked, turning away from the pot on the stove to look at her.   
“Sammy, I got the hiccups.”  
“I can see that.” Sam answered.   
Hick.  
Hick.   
Evy sat at the kitchen table and impatiently laid her head down in her arms.   
Hick.  
Hick.  
“This stinks.” Evy said.  
Sam fought to keep from laughing at her. She was so rarely irritated that it was funny to him when she was. “You know, hiccups mean you’re growing.”  
“But I’ve had ‘em since lunchtime!” Evy protested. “If I have to get hiccups to grow, I don’t want to grow anymore.”  
Sam was grateful she was looking down, because he couldn’t resist letting out a laugh now. Sam silently crept over to the silverware drawer and pulled out the airhorn that was in there. He got as close to Evy as he could, then pressed the horn. Evy jumped so hard that the chair rattled.  
“Sammy!” she said. “You scared me!”   
“Sorry, Cricket.” Sam said. “How about your hiccups?”   
Evy waited almost a full fifteen seconds before speaking. “They’re gone!” she said, a broad grin coming on her face. She grabbed Sam around his waist. “Thanks, Sammy!”   
“Anytime, Cricket.” Sam said. “Go get washed up for dinner.”   
“Okay.” Evy said. “Love you, Sammy.”  
“Love you too, Cricket.”   
Evy ran down the hall to the bathroom to wash her hands. Sam set the table for them to eat, then heard a familiar sound coming from the bathroom.  
Hick.


	9. 8 Years Old

A/N: So I couldn’t think of a good story for when Evy was eight years old, so I reprinted this chapter from my first Evy story, Sensitive Souls are the Strongest.  
Evy laid in bed, her misery threatening to overtake her. Daddy was on a hunt, and Dean had left the house earlier to “get your Christmas present”. Evy hated being alone, especially in a dark house, so Dean had left a nightlight and the radio on. Evy normally loved Christmas music, but not this year. Now that she was alone, the one thing she wanted for Christmas, and couldn’t have, was making her cry all over again. Sammy had been gone now for five months, and Evy missed him more and more every day. She had cried for a solid day after he left, until Daddy had told her to “get over it”, and after that she had cried herself to sleep every night for a week. Dean had tried to fill in the void left by Sam. He read to her every night like Sam had, he hugged and kissed her more than he had before, and he tried as much as he could to soothe her fears. Evy appreciated him trying, but Dean just wasn’t Sammy. Sammy made her feel loved and safe, and no matter how hard Dean tried, he just couldn’t do both at the same time.   
Thinking about Sammy now, Evy felt tears welling up in her eyes. She wanted him, and she wanted him here badly. She wanted him to wrap his arms around her and hold her tight, tell her everything was going to be okay. She wanted to sit in his lap and lay her head against his chest, listening to his heartbeat as she fell asleep. She’d never had Christmas without him, and she didn’t know how she’d be able to do it now. Since no one was in the house at the moment, Evy allowed her tears to flow freely. She clutched Squish to her chest, and cried bitterly. She cried for what felt like forever, and eventually she just became too tired to cry.   
She heard the front door open, and heard Dean talking to someone in a very low voice, probably hoping not to wake her up. Not wanting Dean to know she’d been awake crying the entire time he’d been gone, Evy quickly wiped her face and closed her eyes. She heard the door to her bedroom open, and Dean step in, walking to the side of her bed. Dean gently shook her to wake her up, and Evy made a big show of yawning to make him think he’d done just that.  
“Hey, wake up, kiddo. I’ve got a surprise for you.”  
“Dean?” Evy asked. “What’s going on?”  
“Come on, kiddo, wake up. I’ve got something for you.”   
Dean reached over and turned on the light on her nightstand. Evy slowly sat up and propped herself against the wall. Dean mistook her red and puffy eyes for sleepy eyes, and Evy was grateful. She waited patiently. As miserable as she felt, Dean’s wide grin made her smile. He had obviously done something big for her, and had tried really hard to make her smile.  
“Okay, you awake now?” Dean asked.  
Evy nodded eagerly. She was surprised to find that she actually wanted to see what it was that had Dean so excited.  
“Okay. Close your eyes.” Dean said. “No peeking.”   
Evy glared at him. “Dean, my eyes were closed.”  
Dean laughed. “I know, kiddo. Just humor me, please.”  
Evy smiled and did as Dean said, closing her eyes tightly.  
“How many fingers am I holding up?” Dean asked.  
Evy giggled. “I don’t know.”  
“Alright.” Dean said, satisfied that her eyes were shut.  
Evy heard Dean walk away a few steps. She heard him walk back towards her and put something on her bed. She bit her bottom lip to keep from laughing again, and kept her eyes shut tight.  
“Open up, kiddo.” Dean said, placing a hand on her shoulder.  
Evy opened her eyes slowly. She had felt someone sit down on her bed, and assumed it was Dean. But it wasn’t. Evy sat in shock for a few seconds, thinking that she was dreaming. This couldn’t be real; could it?  
“Hey, Cricket.”   
“Sammy!” Evy shouted, jumping into his arms so quickly that she nearly knocked him backwards.  
Sam laughed as he wrapped Evy in a hug. He had been resistant to this idea from the time Dean presented it to him. But right now, after seeing the way Evy’s face had lit up, Sam was grateful that he’d had sense enough now to listen to him. As he rocked Evy from left to right, he looked over her shoulder and mouthed “thank you” to Dean. Evy pulled away from him slightly, looked at his face, smiled even bigger, and hugged him again.   
“Sammy.” Evy breathed into his shoulder.  
“I’m here, baby.” Sam said. “I’m here.”  
When Evy had finally calmed down somewhat, she pulled away from him again, but stayed firmly in his lap. Evy had tears streaming down her face again, though this time they were clearly tears of joy rather than misery. Evy finally spoke.  
“I thought Daddy said you couldn’t come back for Christmas.” she said.  
“He changed his mind, kiddo.” Dean spoke up quickly when Sam hesitated.  
Evy doubted that. Her father was stubborn, and he had been very, very angry when Sam left. He had allowed Evy to continue to talk to Sam, but Evy was a smart kid. She knew Daddy wasn’t doing that out of the goodness of his heart. She knew he only allowed it in order to keep her from crying all the time. But she had chosen not to say that, for fear of her privilege of talking to Sammy being taken away. Evy chose not to say anything to Dean now either, instead choosing to just enjoy the time she had with Sammy.  
“When do you have to go back, Sammy?” she asked.  
“I’ll be here until the 27th, Cricket.” Sam answered, brushing her hair away from her face.   
So she had Sammy for two days. That wasn’t very long, but she planned to make the most of it. Evy leaned into him again, wanting to hold him down so that he couldn’t leave again. Sam rubbed small circles into her back, trying to relax her.   
“You need to get some sleep, Cricket.” Sam said. “I’ll be here in the morning.”   
Evy sat up again. “Sleep in here with me, Sammy. Please.”   
Sam thought about telling her no, that she needed to get some sleep so she’d be well rested before Santa got there, but Evy’s big, pleading eyes tugged at his heartstrings. He had planned on helping Dean set up the meager Christmas that they had worked together to accomplish. But when Sam glanced at Dean, he saw Dean nodding his head, and Sam smiled.  
“Alright, Cricket. But you have to go to sleep, okay?”   
“Okay, Sammy.” Evy said.  
“I’m gonna go get in my pajamas and I’ll be right back.”   
Evy nodded and hugged Sam again before he left. When Sam was gone, Dean came over to kiss her goodnight, and Evy wrapped her arms around his neck and pulled him in for the tightest hug she’d ever given him.  
“Thank you, Deanie. You’re the best.” Evy said.  
Dean’s heart leapt inside his chest and he squeezed Evy. Anything to make her smile. “You’re welcome, kiddo. I love you.”   
“Love you too.” Evy said sincerely.  
Sam was soon back, changed from the jeans, tshirt, and jacket that he’d been in before to a dark blue shirt and black sweatpants. He’d taken a quick shower, and as he climbed into the bed next to Evy, she crawled over and cuddled into his side. She laid her head against his chest so that she could hear the steady thump thump thump of his heart. Sam wrapped his arms around her, kissed the top of her head tenderly, and whispered “Good night, Cricket.” Evy didn’t respond; she was already drifting into a peaceful sleep, safe and secure and loved in the arms of her big brother. Maybe, Evy thought as she drifted off to sleep, just maybe, everything really would be okay.


	10. 9 Years Old

Sam pulled the car up to the apartment slowly, his mind running at a thousand miles an hour. Evy slept peacefully in the front passenger seat. He leaned back against the window and watched her sleep, thinking about how his life was going to change as soon as he brought Evy inside. No, it’s not going to change, he thought. It’s going back to the way it should be. Sam quietly got out, opening and closing his door, then walked over to the passenger door and opened it. He gently gathered Evy into his arms, grabbed Beanie, her teddy bear, then closed her door with his hip. He decided to leave the bags in the car and get them out in the morning. As Sam started to walk towards the apartment, Evy stirred.   
“S’mmy?” she slurred, mostly asleep.  
“Shh. Go back to sleep, baby.” Sam whispered.  
“We home?” she asked.  
Sam smiled. “Yes, Cricket. We’re home.”   
“’Kay.” Evy said, giving him a small smile before closing her eyes again to go back to sleep.  
Jess, who had been watching from the window ever since Sam pulled up, met them at the door. She let the two of them in, then waited as Sam went to the back to put Evy to bed. Sam placed Evy carefully on her bed, then pulled her blanket close to her. He placed Beanie in her arms, then kissed her forehead. He knew Jess was waiting on him, wanting to talk, but Sam took another long moment to take a close look at his sleeping little girl.  
“Sleep tight, Cricket. Sammy loves you.”   
Evy apparently wasn’t entirely asleep yet, because she groggily answered, “’oo too.”   
He kissed her again, then turned to go and meet Jess in the front room.


	11. 10 Years Old

Evy climbed out of bed carefully, walking towards the front of the house, shaking. She grabbed Beanie and clutched him to her. She’d been woken up by a nightmare, and couldn’t get back to sleep. Just before getting to the front room, however, Evy realized that there was someone else there. Earlier that night, Jess’ parents had come for a visit, and to meet Evy for the first time. They had left before Evy went to bed, but apparently Jess’ mother had come back.  
“Look, Jessica, Evelyn is a sweet little girl. I just don’t think you’re ready for the responsibility of taking care of her yet.”   
Evy felt her heart sink. She’d been happy when she got back to Stanford to find that Jess was living with them now, but it had never occurred to Evy that her presence in Jess’ life might be a burden. She was used to Sam taking care of her, but Jess didn’t have to. Evy had believed the meeting with Jess’ parents went well, but was it possible they’d just been trying to be polite?  
“Mom, stop.” Jess said. “Other than Sam, that little girl has no one. I’m not going to leave her.”  
“Jess, I’m not suggesting that.” Mrs. Moore replied. “I’m just saying, maybe move out back on your own until you and Sam are a little older. You’re nineteen and twenty. You’re both way too young to be taking care of a ten-year-old.”  
Evy leaned against the wall, afraid to come out.  
“Mom, I’m not leaving.” Jess said. “Other than Sam, that little girl has no one. Her father was leaving her alone for days at a time when she was eight. I’m going to show her that she can trust me if it’s the last thing I do.”   
Evy smiled, and decided it was the best time to interrupt. “Jess?”   
Jess, startled, looked towards the hallway. “Hey, you okay?” she asked, walking towards Evy.   
“Where’s Sammy?” Evy asked.  
“He had to go to the student center.” Jess explained. “The alarm system went off. Are you alright?”   
“I had a bad dream.” Evy said.   
“Oh, sweetie.” Jess said. “You want to stay in here?”   
Evy nodded and walked with Jess over to the bed. Jess sat so that she was leaning against the wall, and Evy laid down so that her head was in Jess’ lap. Jess gently stroked her hair and sang to her, and soon Evy was back in a deep sleep. Mrs. Moore watched the entire process. Her entire life, Jess had been rather finicky in deciding what she wanted. But watching her now, with Evy, Mrs. Moore realized that, even if it happened a little too quickly for her taste, Jess had found her family. When Evy was in a deep enough sleep, Jess gently laid her down and walked with her mother out onto the porch.   
“I’m sorry, Jessica.”   
“For what, mom?” Jess asked, surprised.   
“For doubting you. Evelyn belongs with you and Sam.”   
Before Jess could respond, Sam came walking back up the front steps. “Hey, you.” He said, kissing Jess on the cheek.  
“Hi.” Jess replied. “Everything okay?”  
“Yeah, false alarm.” Sam said as he yawned. “Everything okay here?”   
“Mostly. Baby girl’s sleeping on our bed right now.” Jess said.  
“She okay?” Sam asked, concerned.   
“Yeah. She just had a bad dream.” Jess said. “She’s sleeping like a baby now.”   
“Alright. I’m gonna check on her and take a shower.” Sam said. He turned to Mrs. Moore. “Good ngiht, Mrs. Moore. It was good to see you.”   
“Good to see you too, Sam. Good night.”   
Sam left Jess and her mom to talk. He walked slowly towards the bed, leaning over to check on Evy. She was indeed sleeping like Jess said. Sam watched her sleep for a moment before kissing her forehead.  
“Goodnight, Cricket.” Sam whispered. “Sammy loves you.”


	12. 11 Years Old

Jess put down her book when she heard the front door open. Sam stepped inside and was shaking his head at something Evy was saying. Jess couldn’t quite make it out, but she definitely heard Sam say “I did not!” Evy laughed and finally came over to join Jess. Jess asked as Evy wrapped arms around her neck,  
“Hey, you two. How was the dance?”   
Evy very nearly choked laughing again. “Sam tripped and knocked over the snack table.”  
“What?” Jess asked, looking to Sam for confirmation.  
“I didn’t trip….” Sam said, exasperated.  
“Fine. You flew.” Evy said mockingly, making Jess snort and laugh uncontrollably.   
Sam shook his head and pulled something out of his jacket pocket. “If I’m clumsy enough to trip like that, then how did we win this?”   
“What is it?” Jess asked, still laughing. Sam handed her a small, laminated certificate that read Capstone High School 2004 Father/Daughter Dance-Best Couple. “You won best couple?”   
“Yep.” Sam said.   
“That’s because after they picked up the snack table they moved it to the other side of the room.” Evy teased.   
“You need to start heading to bed, smarty pants.” Sam said, ruffling her hair.  
“Okay.” Evy said. She still had her arms around Jess’s neck. She kissed Jess on the cheek then walked over to Sam and hugged him around the waist. “Whatever it was you did,” she said, turning her face up so that her chin was resting just above Sam’s stomach, “thank you for going.”  
“You’re welcome, Cricket.” Sam said. He leaned down and kissed her forehead, then patted her back. “Go on. Get your PJs on. I’ll be in in a minute.”   
“’Kay.” Evy said. “Good night, Jess.”   
“Good night, sweetie.”   
Evy walked back towards her room, and when Sam heard the door shut, he turned towards Jess. He sat down next to her, exhausted, and Jess placed an affectionate hand on the back of his head.   
“So did you trip?” she asked.  
“Over my own feet.” Sam replied.   
Jess laughed and kissed him. “You did a good thing.” She whispered in his ear.   
“Thanks.” Sam said.   
A week earlier, Evy had come home upset over a father/daughter dance that the school was hosting. She had, at first, wanted to call John and try to get him to go. When that didn’t work, she had spent a few hours moping, until she came up with the idea for Sam to go with her. Sam had been reluctant, to say the least. Big social occasions were not his idea of a good time. But Evy’s big, pleading eyes, and Jess standing behind Evy with a don’t you dare turn her down look, had finally made him cave in. He’d been nervous the entire week, and apparently with ample reason, but it had been worth it to see Evy so happy.   
“Hey, Sam?” Jess said.  
“Yep?”   
“You know, the quicker you go say goodnight to Evy, the quicker you can come dance with me.” Jess said.   
Sam, who had closed his eyes briefly, jumped up suddenly. “I’ll be back.”   
“I’ll be here.” Jess said.  
Sam walked over to Evy’s room and knocked. When Evy called “come in”, Sam found her sitting on her bed, writing in her journal. Sam sat on the edge of her bed, waiting patiently while she finished up what she was doing. She closed the journal and put it back under her pillow, then turned to Sammy.   
“You ready for bed, Cricket?”  
“Yeah.” She said, reaching over and grabbing Beanie. “That was fun, Sammy.”  
“I thought so too.” Sam said.   
Evy suddenly looked down and away from Sam, a classic sign that she was thinking about something she didn’t really want to talk about.  
“What’s wrong?” Sam said.  
Evy sighed. “I don’t want to make you feel bad.” She said quietly.  
“It’s okay, Cricket. What is it?” Sam asked again, though he had a feeling he already knew.   
Evy’s eyes misted over with tears. “I was thinking about daddy.”   
Sam nodded sadly. Exactly what he’d been thinking. “I know, Cricket. I wish he’d been here too.”   
Evy smiled. “I don’t.”   
“You don’t?” Sam asked, surprised.  
“No. I don’t.” Evy said. “I mean, I miss him, sure, but…” Evy stopped; what she’d been about to say was more sentimental than she’d realized.   
“But what?” Sam asked.  
Evy smiled again and took Sam’s hand. “But my dad’s right here.” She said.  
Sam sat in a shocked silence for a few seconds before squeezing Evy’s hand. “Come here, you.” He said through a sudden lump in his throat. Evy leaned over and Sam wrapped her into a tight bear hug. “Sammy loves you, Cricket. More than anything in the whole world.”   
“I love you too, Sammy.”


	13. 12 Years Old

Sam pulled his shoes and socks off, placing them on the floor next to the bed. He had just set up Evy’s rollaway bed, and sent her to get a shower and get ready for bed. Dean was out getting them all something for dinner. Evy came out, sitting on the bed next to Sam. Sam noticed she was quiet, like she’d been all afternoon, ever since they’d wrapped up the Wendigo case. Sam waited patiently, but when she didn’t say anything, Sam decided to try and coax her a bit. He grabbed Evy’s hand and gently pulled her to him, until she was leaning against him, arms wrapped around his waist, head resting against his chest. Sam waited again for her to talk as he wrapped his own arms around her. It had only been a couple weeks since Jess’ death, and both of them were still reeling. Evy had done well on the road with him and Dean, and she’d even helped out on their first case. But Sam had noticed that a lot of her usual cheerfulness was gone. Her light seemed to have faded. When she still didn’t say anything, Sam asked quietly,  
“What’s going on with you?”   
Evy took a deep breath before replying. “I need to ask you something.”  
“What is it?” Sam asked.   
“Do you regret it?” Evy said.  
Sam, confused, told her to sit up and asked, “Do I regret what?”   
“Taking care of me.” Evy asked.  
Sam tried to ignore the splinter threatening to drive through his heart. “Cricket, why would you think that?”   
“I overheard you talking to Haley.” Evy explained.  
“About…?”   
Sam stopped suddenly. He’d been close to saying “about what?” when he remembered. He’d had a conversation with Haley about the hard parts of raising a younger sibling. Sam had believed Evy to be asleep, but obviously she hadn’t been. Sam sighed and ran a hand through Evy’s hair.   
“You heard that, huh?” Sam asked.  
“I didn’t mean to.” Evy said. “I was trying to get to sleep, but…”  
“It’s okay, Cricket.” Sam assured her. “You’re not in trouble. But if you remember, Halley and I got interrupted and you didn’t get to hear the rest of it.”   
“The rest of it?” Evy asked. “What do you mean?”  
“Well, what I was going to tell her was this. That even though it’s hard sometimes, there’s two very, very smart decisions that I’ve made in my life. Do you know what they are?” Sam asked.  
“What?” Evy asked.  
“Well, the second smartest decision I’ve made was going to Stanford.” Sam answered. “Do you know why?”   
Evy thought for a moment before answering, “Because it’s where you met Jess.”  
“Right.” Sam said, a stab of sadness piercing his heart. “But do you know what the best decision was?”  
“What?” Evy asked.  
Sam pulled her close and whispered in her ear. “Taking you with me.”   
Evy smiled, but something was still bothering her. “But you took me with you because I asked you to.”  
Sam sighed and explained patiently, “Do you really think for a second, that if I didn’t want you with me, that I would’ve taken you?”   
“I guess not.” Evy said.  
“Baby, listen to me.” Sam said. “You mean more to me than anything else. I love you how much?”   
Evy smiled. She hadn’t said this in years. “To the moon and back.”   
“To the moon and back.” Sam repeated. “And that year I spent at Stanford without you was one of the worst of my life. I missed you every single day. I have never, and will never, regretted taking care of you, no matter what. Understand?”   
“I understand.” Evy answered, then turned and embraced Sam around the neck. “Love you, Sammy.”  
“Love you more, Cricket.” Sam said. “We’re going to be okay. I promise.”   
Evy didn’t respond to that, just hung on and allowed him to hold her close. They stayed that way for a couple of minutes, until Dean came back in with dinner. Evy started to crawl off the bed and over to Dean, but Sam squeezed her one last time.  
“Sammy loves you, Cricket.”   
Evy kissed his cheek and replied, “Cricket loves you too.”


	14. 13 Years Old

“Daddy!”   
Evy had been thrilled less than an hour earlier to see her dad again. She’d given him a quick hug, which he’d broken away from, claiming they needed to get to the motel room “so they could talk some more.” John had invited her to ride back to the motel with him, but Evy declined, not exactly feeling comfortable spending any alone time with him after so long. Evy had felt a pit in her stomach the entire trip to the motel, and now she knew why.  
“And we’ll need to drop your sister at Bobby’s before we can really start…”  
Evy’s heart dropped. I knew it, she thought. He doesn’t want me around. When Dean and Sam didn’t say anything right away, she fought to keep from crying. She couldn’t look at any of them, so she kept her eyes on the bedspread. Had she looked at them, though, she would have seen the look of stone cold fury on Sam’s face, and the struggle on Dean’s as he prepared to stand up to John. Dean saw Sam was about to explode in fury and placed a hand on his shoulder to calm him. He shook his head quickly before saying,  
“Stop right there, Dad. Evy’s not going anywhere. She stays with us. You send her away, me and Sam are gone too. You’re on your own.”  
Evy had been so touched by Dean sticking up to John for her that she wasn’t even aware of what John’s response was. She knew John didn’t refute Dean because Sam immediately relaxed, and Dean looked at her and gave her a smile and a wink. So they went back to discussing the hunt, and Evy went back to organizing her thoughts. Sure enough, though, a few minutes later, the three of them were back to arguing over her. Evy had never felt more like a burden on all of them than she did right now. Dean noticed her looking away from them and had a thought. He pulled the cash he had in his pocket out. It wasn’t much, but it was enough. He walked over to Evy without saying a word to John or Sam. He carefully placed a ten dollar bill in her hand.  
“Go to that hot dog stand down the road and get some dinner. We need to talk alone.” He said.  
Evy smiled at him gratefully and took the money with a quick muttered “thank you” and headed out the door. As soon as the door was shut and Evy was gone, Sam started in on John.  
“Really, Dad? Four years you’ve been gone and you’re already trying to get her out of the way?”   
“Sam, this is too dangerous…” John began.  
“Enough!” Dean shouted. “Both of you! Dad, me and Sam have some things to tell you.”   
Dean started. He began with the moment that he and Sam had decided to take Evy on the road with them. He told John about how Evy had begun training while they were on the road, and how she’d immediately taken to the life like she’d been living in it the entire time. All while doing her schoolwork when Sam told her to and dealing with being uprooted from the only stable life any of them had ever known. He gave John details of how Evy had helped on all the cases they’d worked so far. Fifteen minutes later, after Dean had said everything he wanted to say, John was flabbergasted. Evy had always been a very sensitive child, and seemed to hate the hunting life. It was for that reason that John had never really considered raising her to be a hunter, and that option had permanently been taken away from him when she’d gone to live with Sam. But apparently he’d seriously underestimated Evy. It wasn’t necessarily hunting that she hated; it was constantly being away from her family. John suddenly felt ashamed of himself. Evy had tried to tell him exactly that in the year that Sam had been at Stanford without her. If he had just taken the time to listen to her, he may not have lost her in the first place.   
“She did all of that?” John asked, amazed.  
“Yeah. She did.” Dean answered. “She’s an amazing kid, Dad.”   
“Which you would know if you’d had anything to do with her the last four years.” Sam put in bitterly.   
Dean sighed. He’d hoped Sam would be at least somewhat civil with John when he finally confronted him about Evy. But, in all honesty, he didn’t blame Sam for being annoyed at John, so he couldn’t really tell him to stay calm. Dean just hoped that the conversation they were about to have wouldn’t expose the secret he’d been keeping from the two of them ever since Evy had moved out.   
“Sam, look, I’m sorry. I didn’t think it was safe to stay in contact with her…” John started.  
“But it was okay to get her hopes up every year by sending her a birthday card and then not saying anything the rest of the year. Dad, how could you play with her emotions like that…?” Sam asked.  
“Wait. What birthday card?” John asked. “I never sent her anything.”   
Both Sam and John immediately stopped talking. Dean was looking away from both of them, and it was nearly a full minute before Sam placed all the pieces together. His anger at his father before was nothing compared to what it was at that moment.  
“You have got to be kidding me.” He said.  
John was still confused. “What the hell is going on, you two?”   
Sam turned to Dean and asked him point blank, “You wrote the birthday cards, didn’t you?”   
Dean decided it wasn’t worth it to deny it anymore. “Yeah.”   
Sam wanted to be mad at Dean for keeping this a secret, but he couldn’t. Dean had just been trying to help taper some of Evy’s hurt feelings. Make her believe that John still cared about her, even if he didn’t know how to say it. Sam ran a hand over his face.   
“No matter what we talk about in this room, no one tells her about this. Agreed?” John and Dean both agreed, and Sam continued confronting John. “Dad, do you know how Evy spent the first part of her tenth birthday?”  
John started to talk, but found there was nothing he could really say to defend himself. “No.” he said quietly.  
“She spent the first couple of hours looking at the phone waiting on you to call. Then when she tried to call you, you told Dean to lie to her and say that you weren’t there. She was devastated, Dad. She spent her birthday crying because she didn’t think she deserved any love or attention from you.”   
John felt as if he’d been punched in the gut. It had never been his intention to make Evy feel like he didn’t love her. But looking back, he realized that he’d given her no reason to think otherwise. All the good he’d done as a hunter suddenly seemed to mean nothing when he realized that he’d hurt his baby so profoundly.  
“Does she still think that?” John asked quietly.  
“No.” Sam answered. “Jess convinced her she was wrong. That whatever was going through your head, it wasn’t her fault. That she was just as important as the two of us and that we loved her just like you did.”  
And with that, Sam launched into the story of how Evy and Jess’s relationship had developed, and ended with what had happened the night Jess had died. Once again, John was left speechless. He hadn’t known that Evy and Jess had been that close, and hadn’t realized how much trauma she’d been through because of the demon. He was starting to see Evy in an entirely new light. John checked the clock and saw that almost a half hour had passed since Dean had sent Evy out of the room.  
“I’ll be back, boys.” He said as he walked over to pick up his coat. “I’ve got to go talk to your sister.”


	15. 14 Years Old

Evy sat at the table in the small motel room, picking at her food. She’d been quiet ever since saying good night to Sam earlier. Dean had waited for quite a while for Evy to talk, but when she didn’t, he reached over and grabbed her hand.   
“What’s wrong with you?” he asked.  
Evy was startled out of her thoughts by Dean’s hand on hers. “What do you mean?”   
“This is your favorite dinner. And you’ve barely touched it. What’s wrong?” Dean asked. “Does it have something to do with Sam?”   
Evy shuffled uncomfortably. “No. Not really.” She answered. “Well, kind of. I didn’t want to tell him and hurt his feelings, though.”   
“Well, that’s what I’m here for.” Dean encouraged. “What’s wrong?”   
“I was thinking about Jess.”   
“What about her?” Dean asked gently.  
It was a long moment before Evy answered. “I know Sammy likes Madison. I’m glad. But…”   
“But…you’re worried it means he doesn’t love Jess anymore?” Dean guessed.   
“No. Not exactly.” Evy said. “It’s just that, seeing him so happy with Madison reminds me how much I miss Jess.”   
Dean nodded. “I see.”   
He wished that Sam was there. Sam was better at talking and guiding Evy through tough stuff like this than he was. Luckily, once Evy did open up and start talking, she tended to keep doing so.  
“I just hoped that, after some time had passed, I’d be able to think about her without missing her so much.” Evy explained.  
“Listen up, kiddo.” Dean said. “I know you miss Jess. That’s okay. But I think she would want you and Sam to be happy. Right?”   
“Yeah.” Evy said, and finally a smile came to her face. “She would.”   
“And missing her’s not really a bad thing. It helps you remember her.” Dean said. When Evy didn’t respond, Dean added, “Sorry, kiddo. I’m trying here.”  
Evy smiled at him. “It’s okay, Deanie. You’re right. She wouldn’t me to think about her and be sad. She always tried to make me and Sam happy.”   
“How’d she do that?” Dean asked.  
Before long, Evy was talking about Jess and it completely turned her around. Before she went to sleep that night, she gave Dean a hug and said,  
“Thanks, Deanie. You’re the best.”  
“You’re welcome, kiddo.” Dean said. “You feel better?”  
“Yeah. I do.” Evy said. “Love you, Deanie.”   
“Love you too, kiddo.” Dean said. “Goodnight.”   
“Goodnight, Deanie.” Evy said through a long yawn.   
Dean patted her back and said, “Time for bed, kiddo. Sleep tight.”   
Evy laid down in the hotel bed, thinking about better times in days past with Sam and Jess. For once, this didn’t give her bad dreams. She didn’t think about the night that Jess died; she thought of nights that the three of them had spent up talking, playing games, and doing family things together. She slept peacefully all through the night. Though she was deep in sleep when he said it and didn’t hear him, Evy did smile a little while later when Dean leaned over her to check on her. He kissed her forehead and told her quietly,  
“Good night, sweetheart. Deanie loves you.”


	16. 15 Years Old

Evy checked herself in the mirror for the fiftieth time that morning. This is silly, she thought. I should just tell Bobby I’ve changed my mind. Another voice suddenly interrupted her doubts. She didn’t know how she knew, but it was the voice of her mother. No. Go. You deserve this. Evy smiled, picked up her backpack, and walked out to the front where Bobby was waiting.  
“Hey, Baitfish.” He said, greeting her warmly.  
“Hi, Bobby.” She said, putting down her backpack on a chair and walking over to kiss his cheek. “Did you make breakfast for me?”  
“Sure did.” Bobby said. “Eat up.”  
As he watched Evy eat her breakfast, Bobby thought back over the last two weeks. Dean had been buried nearly three weeks earlier. Sam had stayed at Bobby’s for two days before leaving in the middle of the night for only he knew where. A devastated Evy had cried for the next three days straight, until Sam had finally called to explain that he wasn’t coming back. Bobby had only heard one end of the conversation, but he didn’t think he’d ever forget the devastated look on her face as she hung up the phone and said with a dazed expression,  
“He left me, Bobby.”  
The next few days had been spent with Evy moping around Bobby’s house. Bobby had tried to get her to go on a hunt with him to keep her mind off Sam, but she’d refused. Then, two weeks to the day that they’d buried Dean, Evy had come to him with a rather unique idea. She wanted to go back to high school. Bobby had been skeptical at first, then decided that it might be a good idea. So he’d enrolled her at the local high school as a tenth grader under the name Abigail Singer, and this morning was her first day. As Evy ate her breakfast, Bobby asked,  
“You nervous?”  
Evy shrugged. “A little.” She said. “But I’m kind of excited too.”  
Bobby smiled. “Good. I’m proud of you for doing this, Baitfish.”  
Evy checked the clock, then jumped up. “I got to go. I’ll be late.” Evy threw her dishes in the sink quickly, then kissed Bobby on the cheek. “Bye, Bobby. Love you.”  
“Bye, Baitfish. Love you too.” Bobby said. “Have a good day.”  
Evy started to head out the door, before turning back and saying, “Hey, Bobby? Thanks. For everything.”  
Bobby smiled and answered, “Get on, Baitfish. Go to school.”  
As Evy left, Bobby thought to himself Who’d have ever thought you’d be sending a kid off to school? Shaking his head, he poured another cup of coffee and headed out to the salvage yard. His last thought before starting his work for the day was Be careful out there, Baitfish. Bobby loves you.


	17. 16 Years Old

Evy yawned, preparing for bed with a heavy heart. It was her favorite day of the year, and it looked like Sam had forgotten. She wasn’t angry or upset; they were in the middle of a hunt, and she would’ve been surprised if he had. Sam had left on a supply run hours earlier, and now Evy was getting ready to go to bed. Just as she was about to say goodnight to Dean, the motel room door opened and Sam walked in. He had a grocery bag in each hand.  
“Hey, Cricket. You’re going to bed already?” he asked.  
“Yeah.” Evy said.   
“Well, okay.” Sam said as he laid the groceries down on the table. “Before you do, though, would you mind going to the car for me and getting the rest of the bags?”   
“Sure.”   
Evy climbed off the bed and started to head to the car. Before she was out the door, though, she saw what Sam was really up to. The backseat of the Impala was red, green, blue, yellow, pink, and purple. Evy turned back to Sam with her mouth open in surprise. Dean, curious as to Evy’s sudden change in demeanor, came over to see what she was looking at.  
“Why is the backseat of my car rainbow colored?” he asked.  
Evy smiled. “You remembered.”   
Sam walked over to her and kissed her forehead. “Of course I did. You ready?”   
“You bet.” Evy said, running out to the car.   
Sam followed her out, Dean close behind him. While Evy gathered the balloons in her hand, Sam explained the meaning of their ritual to Dean. When she was ready, Evy came back over to join them, both hands full of balloons. Sam walked over to her left side, Dean took a place on her right. Sam for a moment pictured the little six year old baby girl sitting on his hip, waiting for him to tell her to let the balloons go the first time. Much to Sam’s disappointment, she was too big for him to pick up now, so Sam just put an arm around her shoulder.  
“Ready whenever you are, Sammy.” Evy said.  
“Alright.” Sam said. “On the count of three. One, two, three.”   
The balloons rose quickly, and Evy watched them until they were nothing more than specks in the sky. Evy thanked Sam and asked him and Dean for a moment alone. When the two of them had shut the door to the room, Evy turned and looked back up at the sky, where the moon was now in full bright view. A shooting star appeared above her.  
“Good night, mom.” She whispered. “I love you.”


	18. 17 Years Old

Sam held in his hands another cup of coffee, his fifth in just a few hours. It most likely would have been more if he hadn’t been sneaking them past Dean. He stared down at Evy, who was lying in bed for the third day in a row with a high, delirious fever. She was sleeping now, after being awake and crying for nearly an hour straight. Sam knew whatever exhaustion he was feeling at the moment was nothing compared to what Evy was going through. That and that alone was what kept him awake.  
When Evy started whimpering again, Sam put the coffee on the table next to the bed. He checked the clock; it was way too early to give her any more pain medication. Sam sighed; he hated this more than facing any monster. He wished he could trade places with her and be the one on the bed right now, squirming in pain. Sam decided to do the only thing he could think of. He just hoped it would work. He laid down on the bed next to her, then gingerly picked her up so that he could hold her without hurting her. She winced a little in her sleep.  
“Shh. It’s okay, Cricket.”   
Evy calmed a little. She opened her eyes and seemed to check to make sure it was him there. Sam realized that she wasn’t awake because she was hurting again; she’d been having a nightmare. Sam held her close for a moment before he got an idea. Evy instinctively leaned into Sam’s chest, listening to his heartbeat. Sam kissed the top of her head, and felt his heart sink a little when he realized she was still burning up.  
“I’m so sorry, baby.” He whispered. When Evy whimpered again, Sam said, “Shh. Sammy’s here, Cricket.” Another idea occurred to him. “Don’t you feel it growing, day by day, people getting ready for the news…”   
Evy calmed under Sam’s soothing voice, and soon fell back to sleep. Sam sang to her a couple more times, before deciding she was asleep for at least a couple more hours. He watched her sleep for a few minutes before whispering,  
“Sleep well, Cricket. Sammy loves you.”


	19. 18 Years Old

A/N: This chapter’s a little different. Evy is back on the road with Sam and Dean after being attacked by Lillith. She is a little frustrated with how Sam and Dean are treating her, and she writes a diary entry expressing her feelings.  
Dear Diary,  
If Sam and Dean baby me anymore, I swear I will scream at both of them. I’ve been back on the road with them for three weeks, and it’s like they think I can’t do anything. The other day, Sam even told me not to do some research because it was “too strenuous”. Really, Sam? Really? Will it be too strenuous when I kick your gigantic butt from here to next year? Bobby says to just be patient with them, that they’ll stop eventually. He reminded me that they weren’t really there while I was recovering, so they don’t see like he does how far I’ve come.  
But that’s the problem. All Sam and Dean see is the fact that I’m still limping. When my leg starts hurting, I have to hide it from them or they give me this look like they just killed my best friend. They’re stuck in seeing me as their hurt, frail little sister. I was worried right after Lillith attacked me that I’d never be able to help them again. I guess I should have been worried about what would happen when I did recover.   
I know they don’t mean to make me feel bad by babying me, but they do. When they tell me to rest or not do something, it takes me back to the first few days when I started to recover from the attack. When I felt so useless. When I really did have to be taken care of because I couldn’t walk from the living room of Bobby’s house outside to Baby without feeling like my leg would fall off. But all that’s gone now. I can do almost everything I could do before. I’m a little slower than I used to be, but I’m still the same person. I just wish they’d see that.  
Sam came back to the motel room a few minutes ago with balloons for mom’s birthday. After we sent them up, he sat me down and asked me how I was doing. I tried to get away with an answer of “Fine, Sammy,” but of course he saw right through that. We talked through a lot of stuff. He apologized again for leaving me at Bobby’s. I told him the truth, that I forgave him for that. I told him how I was feeling about him and Dean babying me and he promised to talk to Dean about it. It was the first good conversation that Sam and I had really had since that confrontation at the hospital a couple months ago. I feel like I got my brother back today. So maybe some good has finally come out of all this.   
I’m barely keeping my eyes open right now, so I’m going to bed. Hopefully tonight was the beginning of us going back to normal.


	20. 19 Years Old

“What do you mean I can’t go?”   
Dean was shocked. Evy had been taking it easy on hunting ever since the two of them had started back on it, but she seemed almost completely back to normal now. Maybe it was the fact that Sam had his soul back now, and that she wasn’t leery of spending any alone time with him, but she seemed to be trying to prove to the two of them her abilities again. The problem was, Dean didn’t doubt Evy’s abilities. That wasn’t what was making him try to get her to stay behind.   
“You can’t go because the dragon goes after…” Dean squirmed. He hated even bringing this subject up around Evy.   
“After what, Dean?” Evy asked.  
“Virgins.” Sam answered. If he waited for Dean to answer her they’d be there forever. “Sorry, Cricket, I’m with Dean on this one.”  
The realization hit Evy like a slap to the face. They didn’t know. She could talk to them both, about anything, and she knew that. But the magnitude of what she was about to tell them almost made her decide to just stop fighting and not go on the hunt. No, she thought. They’re gonna have to find out sometimes. Might as well tell them now. Evy took a deep breath.  
“Oh, boy.” She said.  
“What?” Sam asked.  
“Um, guys, I got some bad news.” She said.   
Sam and Dean both looked at her concerned. “What is it, Cricket?” Sam asked, putting down the book he had in his hand.  
“Well, you see, the dragon’s not coming after me.” She said, waiting to see who would catch her meaning first.  
“Look, baby girl, this isn’t about what I think you can do…” Dean said.  
“Dean, stop.” Evy said, interrupting him. “I know the dragon is not coming after me.” She pointed to herself for emphasis.   
It was Sam who caught it first. He was rarely speechless, but his mouth hung open in pure shock. Dean was still babbling, trying to explain himself. When he noticed Sam not commenting, he turned to ask him for backup, then stopped. He realized what Evy had just told them and stared at her just like Sam.  
“Wha…Whe…When?” Sam asked.  
When? Evy thought. “What do you mean?” she asked.  
“When did this happen?” Sam asked. “You’re with us almost 24/7.”  
“It wasn’t recently.” Evy said. As amusing as their reactions were to her, she decided to speed the process along and just tell them the whole truth. “It happened when I lived with Bobby. While Dean was in hell and you were off with Ruby.”  
“You were fifteen!” Dean said, speaking for the first time since he’d realized what she said. “What the hell was Bobby doing?”  
“You’re mad at Bobby?” Evy asked.   
“Hell, yes!” Dean answered emphatically. “He just let you go off with some kid you met on a hunt…”  
“First of all,” Evy said, jumping up from her seat on the motel bed. Though she was a few inches shorter than Dean and more petite, the change in her demeanor intimidated him and he shut right up. “I didn’t hunt during those four months. Bobby enrolled me in the local high school and I went back to school. Secondly, I’ve never told Bobby. He thinks that we were at the movies that night. But I wouldn’t be surprised if he’s figured it out by now. Thirdly, Bobby had met him several times and knew who he was. Finally, I know better than to just be alone with “some random guy”. I’m not stupid, Dean. We used protection, and I did all the checks. He wasn’t a demon, werewolf, or anything like that. He was just an awkward, shy teenager who thought the world revolved around me. I don’t regret it and I never will. Got it?”   
“Got it.” Dean said quietly after a moment.   
“Cricket, why didn’t you tell us all this?” Sam asked.  
Evy turned to him sadly. “Because I didn’t trust you at the time.” She said honestly. When Sam turned away, she walked over and wrapped her arms around his neck. “But I do now. Which is why I told you. Are you mad?”   
“No.” Sam answered. “I just wish you didn’t have to grow up so fast.”   
Evy smiled and turned back to Dean. “Deanie?”   
“No. I’m not mad.” Dean answered. “Not at you. But who was the kid?”   
Evy laughed. “Nice try. I’m not telling you his name.”   
“What? You trust Sam but not me?” Dean asked.  
“I’m not telling either of you his name.” Evy answered. “I don’t trust either of you not to track him down and kill him.”   
“Ah, come on…” Dean said.   
“No, Dean.” Evy said firmly. “Now can I go on the hunt?”   
Sam and Dean shared a look before Sam answered, “Yeah, I guess so.”   
“Thank you, Sammy.” She said, kissing his cheek. “I’m gonna go to the bathroom then I’ll be ready to go.”   
Sam grabbed her and hugged her before letting her go. “You know how much I love you, right?” he asked.  
Evy smiled. “Yeah, Sammy. To the moon and back. I love you too.”  
Dean had snuck behind the two of them. “Love you too, kiddo.”  
“Love you more, Deanie.”


	21. 20 Years Old

“Bobby, how could you just let her go off with that guy?” Dean asked for the thousandth time in two hours.  
Bobby chuckled, obviously enjoying Dean’s torment. “I know him and Baitfish does too.”  
“Well, who was he?” Sam asked, only slightly less annoyed than Dean.  
“If Baitfish wants you to know that, she’ll tell you when she gets here.” Bobby said.  
“Where’d they go?” Dean tried.  
“Dean, she’s twenty.” Bobby said, exasperated. “If she wants you to know that, she’ll tell you then too.”  
_Six Hours Earlier_  
 _“Mr. Singer?”_  
 _Sam, Dean, and Bobby looked up at the sound of the unfamiliar voice. A tall, skinny kid with messy black hair stood there. He looked to be around twenty, the same age as Evy. Before anyone could reply, Evy came back around the corner from the bathroom._  
 _“Tommy?”_  
 _The kid, apparently named Tommy, turned around to face Evy and his face lit up in a smile. “Abby?”_  
 _“Wow. Hi!”_  
 _As Evy grabbed Tommy to give him a hug, Sam and Dean mouthed to each other “Abby?” Bobby shook his head and watched the two of them, smiling. He had known Tommy was coming and called him to surprise Evy._  
 _“What are you doing here?” Evy asked as she pulled away from him._  
 _“Um…” Tommy looked towards Bobby, who nodded and pointed towards the outside of the diner. “Can we talk outside?”_  
 _“Sure.” Evy said. She grabbed her bag and saw the confused looks on the faces of Sam and Dean. “Um…” She decided it was best to introduce them and leave. “Tommy, these are my brothers, Sam and Dean.”_  
 _Tommy quickly shook hands with Sam first, and then Dean. “Your brother Dean? The one who…”_  
 _“It’s a very, very, very long story.” Evy said. “Let’s head outside and talk like you said.”_  
 _Had she not been going outside with Tommy, Evy would have laughed at the looks on Sam and Dean’s faces. She just wanted to get away and talk to Tommy in private. Once she was out the door, Sam and Dean started in on Bobby._  
 _“Bobby, what the hell?”_  
 _Bobby deftly avoided their protests, and forbade them from going outside and barging in on Evy and Tommy’s conversation. He refused to tell them what was going on, more out of amusement than any other reason. He fought back a laugh. Less than a minute after going outside, Evy walked back in and over to the table next to Bobby. She was grinning and looked excited._  
 _“He told me you called him.” Bobby just shrugged as if to say yeah, so? and Evy wrapped her arms around his neck and kissed his cheek. “Thank you, Bobby. You’re the best.”_  
 _“You’re welcome, Baitfish.” Bobby said._  
 _“I have one more thing to ask you for.”_  
 _Evy leaned in close and whispered something in Bobby’s ear, making him laugh. It took her close to a full minute, and by the time she finished, Bobby was simply nodding his head in agreement with whatever she was saying. When Evy pulled away, she simply kissed Bobby on the cheek, thanked him again, and turned around and left, leaving Sam and Dean sitting there with their mouths hanging open._  
 _“Bobby, what the…” Dean started to ask_.  
Bobby’s thoughts were interrupted by his cell phone going off. It was a text from Evy. I can almost hear them griping about this. Would you please give them the basics about Tommy so that I’m not playing twenty questions when I get there? Bobby chuckled and put the phone away. He did as Evy asked and told them how Evy had met Tommy. He had been her only real friend when she’d started back to school while living with him a few years earlier. They’d dated a few times. Tommy had known her as Abigail Singer, and him as her father. Just as he was ending the story, Evy walked back in. She waved out into the parking lot, then turned around grinning to everyone. When she noticed the looks on Sam and Dean’s faces, she laughed out loud and walked back over to Bobby.  
“You have fun, Baitfish?” Bobby asked.  
“Yeah.” Evy said. “Yeah, I did.”  
“What’d you guys do?” Sam asked.  
“Nothing.” Evy said. “Went and got burgers and talked.”  
“For seven hours?” Dean asked.  
“Yes, Dean.” Evy answered, rolling her eyes slightly. “For seven hours. We, um….” Evy looked to Bobby, who nodded in a silent understanding. “We had a lot to talk about.”  
“What do you mean?” Sam asked.  
Evy sighed. “We were more than just friends.” She admitted. “And I kind of left him for another guy.”  
“Who?” Dean asked.  
“Who what?” Evy asked.  
“You said you left him for another guy.” Sam said. “Who was the guy?”  
Suddenly, all of Evy’s excitement over seeing Tommy again drained form her face. She looked sad. She looked down at the floor for nearly thirty seconds before answering them. She took Bobby’s hand and said,  
“I’m going for a walk.”  
“Alright, Baitfish. Be careful.” Bobby said.  
Evy nodded and headed out the door without saying anything else to them.  
“Bobby?” Dean and Sam asked at the same time.  
Bobby, who was watching the door where Evy had just left, sighed. “It was you two.”  
Sam and Dean looked at each other, puzzled. “What do you mean?”  
“She stopped seeing him when Dean came back from hell.” Bobby explained. “When she went back on the road with you two.”  
Neither brother quite knew what to say to that. They both knew that Evy had gone back to school during the four months she’d lived with Bobby, but neither fully realized exactly what she had given up. They both felt guilty. They wanted her to have a normal life as possible, but evidently Evy had chosen to give that up and stay with them. Evy returned a few minutes later. Sam and Dean got up together and, without warning, engulfed her in a hug.  
“We love you, Cricket.” Sam told her. “More than anything.”  
“Love you, kiddo.” Echoed Dean.


	22. 21 Years Old

_No Missed Calls_  
Evy felt her heart drop in disappointment. It had been three days since she’d heard from Sam, the longest they’d gone without talking in a long time. She set her backpack down, thankful that her roommate wasn’t home. Sam had been in the back of her mind all day. She knew that he was in Texas somewhere, but he wouldn’t be specific with her.  
_“I don’t know where I’ll end up, Cricket.” he had said. “I’ll call you in a few days.”_  
The call had ended without Sam saying “I love you”, the first time she remembered that ever happening. He’d texted it to her that night and every night since, but she missed hearing him say it. Just as she sat down on her bed, an alarm went off on her phone.  
_Call Dean and say Happy Birthday_  
Evy felt her heart break. Dean had been missing now for weeks. Sam had decided not to look for him, and after thinking it over, she had decided not to either. But it was killing her. Losing Dean seemed to mean losing Sam too. And with Bobby and John gone, she felt more alone now than ever. Evy stared at the message for a couple minutes, tears welling up in her eyes as she thought about Dean. A knock at the door broke her out of her thoughts.  
“One second!” she said, wiping her face before answering it. At the door was Jackson Kenley, another student in her freshmen English class. “Oh, hey, Jack.” Evy answered, sniffing slightly. “What’s up?”  
“Are you okay?” he asked immediately. “You look like you’ve been crying.”  
“No, I’m fine.” Evy said. “Did you need something?”  
“Um, yeah.” Jack said. “My laptop died in class today. Could I copy your notes?”  
“Sure.” Evy said, walking over and pulling her laptop out of her backpack. “Come on in. I’ll email them to you.”  
“Thanks.” Jack said, walking in. He looked around and noticed that she was alone. “Where’s your roommate?”  
“Off at the library, I think.” Evy answered simply.  
“Who’s Dean?” Jack asked suddenly.  
Evy stopped what she was doing and immediately turned to Jack. “What?”  
“Sorry. Your phone’s blinking.” Jack explained, pointing to Evy’s phone which was still on the table.  
“Oh.” Evy said, turning back to her laptop. She swallowed hard and answered, “Dean’s my brother.”  
“Older or younger?” Jack asked.  
Though Evy knew Jack was just trying to be polite and make small talk, she bit back a sharp response of “Mind your own business!”. She didn’t feel like talking about Dean or Sam right then. She needed to focus on her schoolwork. But being reminded about it made the tears start flowing again. Jack heard her stop typing and glanced at her, alarmed to see that she’d started crying.  
“Are you okay?” Jack asked, taking a tissue from Evy’s roommate’s desk and handing it to her.  
“Yeah.” Evy said, dabbing at her eyes again. “Sorry.”  
“It’s okay.” Jack said. “Look, I know you don’t know me real well, but you can talk to me.”  
Evy smiled and brushed her hair back behind her ear. She had a bit of a crush on Jack, and was nervous talking to him. But he seemed really sweet, and she did need to talk about what was going on in her life. She knew she couldn’t tell him everything, but it might help to open up a little. She turned to Jack and explained,  
“Dean’s my older brother. He went missing a few weeks ago.”  
“Missing?” Jack asked. “What happened?”  
“My, um, other brother, Sammy called. He said that Dean was gone and he didn’t know where he was.” Evy said. “We haven’t seen him since.”  
“So you’ve got two older brothers?” Jack asked. Evy nodded and pointed at a picture on her desk of the two of them. “Where’s Sammy?”  
“He’s kind of….drifting right now. I’m not sure exactly where he is.” Evy said.  
“What about your parents?” Jack asked. “What do they think of all this?”  
“My mom died when I was born. My dad died when I was fourteen. Sam and Dean pretty much raised me.”  
The next thing she knew, they were talking about anything and everything. Jack soon had her laughing so hard she was crying all over again. They went out for coffee, and came back to the dorm, still talking. Evy checked her phone when she realized someone was trying to get ahold of her. It was a text from her roommate.  
Are you okay? You never came back last night.  
Evy, alarmed, checked the clock on her phone. It was 6:15am. “Oh, my God.” She said, laughing.  
“What?” Jack asked.  
“Look.” Evy said, showing him her phone. “We’ve been talking for fourteen hours.”  
“What?” Jack said. “Really?”  
“Yeah. You came to get your notes at four o’clock yesterday.”  
“I guess you’re right.” Jack said. “Well, that answers a question for me.”  
“What question?” Evy asked curiously.  
“Whether or not I can do this.”  
Jack suddenly put a hand behind Evy’s head and gently pulled her towards him. He kissed her slowly, and pulled away, laughing at Evy’s dazed expression.  
“Was I right?” he asked.  
After a long moment, Evy asked, “Right about what?”  
Jack laughed again. “Whether I could do that.”  
“Why don’t you try it again and we’ll see?” Evy said.  
“Okay.” Jack said, laughing all over again.  
Suddenly her problems with Sam and Dean seemed far away. Her heartache of a few hours earlier was now down to just a dull ache, and as she locked hands with Jack, she couldn’t keep the smile off her face. When Jack had to leave for a class, he asked hopefully,  
“See you tonight?”  
“You bet.” Evy said, giving him one last kiss on the cheek.


	23. 22 Years Old

“Enough!” Evy shouted.   
Sam and Dean both stopped and stared at Evy. Dean had insisted on coming to see Evy in person when he’d gotten back from purgatory the day before. The meeting had gone great at first, but Sam and Dean had devolved into another argument over Sam not searching for Dean while he was gone. Before either of them could say anything, Evy continued.  
“Dean, you’re upset he didn’t look for you. I get that. But I’m glad he didn’t. Sam’s been happier this year than I’ve seen him since we were with Jess. If you can’t understand that, tough. But I’m not gonna let you give Sam a hard time about this. The three of us did agree not to look for each other.”  
Dean was startled, but still tried to defend himself. “But, we always looked for each other…”   
“Like you went looking for Sam when he was in hell?” Evy asked.   
“That was different….” Dean answered.  
“No. It really wasn’t Dean. Sam made you promise not to look for him in hell, and you didn’t.” Evy said.   
“I was taking care of you!” Dean said.   
“That’s a lame excuse and you know it.” Evy said. “It was nearly a month after Sam was in hell before I got sick. You had plenty of time to start looking for him. No, you went straight to Lisa’s and stayed there.” Dean finally stopped trying to defend himself and looked down. Evy walked over and wrapped her arms around him. “Enough fighting. I missed you, Deanie.”   
Dean returned her hug, thinking to himself God, I missed you too, baby. “I missed you too, kiddo.” He patted Evy’s back and told her, “Now come on. Tell me what you’ve been up to.”   
Evy took them over to her favorite coffee house, telling them about her life at school. She went into details about the classes she was taking and what she was learning in them. Sam was fascinated, but Dean’s eyes began to glaze over. Evy decided to leave out telling them about Jack, who was away visiting his parents. She didn’t want to deal with them asking a million questions about him, especially with Dean still being somewhat shaken from his experience in purgatory. When Sam and Dean left early the next morning, Evy grabbed Dean around the neck for what seemed like the fiftieth time since he’d shown up.  
“I’m so glad you’re okay.” Evy whispered in his ear.  
“And I’m proud of you, kiddo.” Dean said. “You need anything, call us, okay?”   
“Okay.” Evy said. It had been a long year without Dean, and she didn’t want to let him go. “I love you, Deanie.”   
“Love you too, kiddo.”


	24. 23 Years Old

Evy climbed out of the Impala, following close behind Sam and Dean. They were going to grab her stuff from her dorm room, what little of it she had, and ride back to the bunker. Evy was laughing at some stupid joke Dean was making when she took out her key to open her door. She was so distracted that she didn’t even noticed the door was already unlocked.  
“SURPRISE!”   
Evy jumped and fell back into Sam. In the room was Charlie, Jody, Claire, Alex, and Cass. Cass was looking bewildered at the proceedings, but Charlie, Jody, Claire, and Alex all grabbed her into a tight group hug.  
“We’re so proud of you!” Jody said.  
“Good job, girlie.” Claire said.   
Evy eventually unwrapped herself from the group and looked around. “Were all of you there?”   
Cass answered in his usual flat monotone. “Yes. We were.”   
“Oh, you guys….” Evy said. “Why didn’t you tell me?”   
“Because this wouldn’t have been a surprise then, silly.” Charlie said, wrapping an arm around her neck and ruffling her hair playfully.  
Evy laughed. Though she’d only met Charlie in person a few times, they’d turned into close friends. When Charlie had realized that she really only talked to Sam and Dean, she’d basically forced her phone number on Evy and called her three times a week. At first it had been a little annoying, as Evy tended to be introverted, but she’d eventually grown to love Charlie.   
“I love you guys.” Evy said to the whole room.  
“Ah, we love you too, kiddo.” Dean said.   
“What do you want to do for dinner?” Sam said. “It’s completely up to you.”   
“I know the perfect place.” She said. “Come on.”  
At the diner she picked out, the group continued to gush over Evy’s graduation. As the night began to wind down and everyone started to get tired, Evy pulled a sheet of paper out from her pocket and asked for everyone’s attention.   
“So, um, I wrote two speeches for today. The one I gave at the podium today was the second one. I decided to cut this part out because I wanted you to hear it in private.” She unfolded the paper and took a deep breath. “I’m too nervous to do this. Jody, do you mind?”   
“Sure.” Jody said. She started on Evy’s speech. “ ‘There’s not one person here in this auditorium who made it completely on their own. There’s four people in my life that got me here. Two of them are here today and two of them aren’t. First, my dad, John Winchester. We had a tough time before he died, but he did his best to take care of me and make sure I knew he loved me.  
The second one adopted me as his daughter. Bobby liked to pretend he was this big, rough and tough type of guy. And he was. But he had the biggest heart. And he used it to make sure that I knew I was loved, no matter what was going on in our crazy lives. Then there’s the two people that are here. My older brothers Sam and Dean. We’ve been through more than anyone knows, and I’d be lost without both of them. They both taught me to believe that I can do anything I set my mind to, and without them, I don’t know where I’d be right now. I’ve never doubted that I was loved or cared about because of them.’ ”  
Jody folded up the paper with the end of Evy’s speech on it. Evy finally looked over at Sam, who had a grateful tear running down his cheek. He hugged Evy and whispered “I love you so much, Cricket.” Evy looked over at Dean, who wasn’t looking at either of them.   
“Dean?”   
“Yeah?” Dean said, not turning around.  
“Are you crying?” she asked.   
“No. It’s these damn onions.” Dean said, pointing at his plate of steak and onions he’d eaten for dinner.  
Evy laughed and pulled away from Sam. “Dean? You ate all the onions.”   
Dean turned around and Evy saw he was, indeed, crying. Dean grabbed her in a hug too. “Love you, kiddo.”   
“Love you too, Deanie.” Evy said. “Let’s go home.”


	25. 24 Years Old

Evy sat at the table, looking down at the floor and away from Sam and Dean. They were in the kitchen having some coffee as Sam, Dean, Cass, and Mary ran through the story of what had happened earlier that night. Evy had not said anything since they’d started talking. She’d been so thrilled to have Sam and Dean back, and now that she realized all of that could have turned out differently, she was seething. When Mary finally stopped talking, Evy looked up at everyone in the room.  
“Cricket?” Sam asked. “You okay? You haven’t said much.”  
Evy took a moment and thought about what to say. She opted instead for standing up and walking over to Cass. She said nothing as she wrapped her arms around his neck and held on for close to thirty seconds. Finally she kissed his cheek and said,  
“Thank you, Cass. For saving them. For everything.”   
A relieved Cass nodded and returned her hug. “You’re very welcome.”   
Evy broke away from Cass and faced Sam and Dean. “I get why you two did what you did. And I’m not mad. I’m going to bed right now, and when I get up in the morning, that’s it. But I need you both to listen to what I’m about to say. Okay?”  
Sam and Dean both nodded in agreement.   
“You guys were gone. I didn’t know if you were dead or alive or hurt or what.” She said. “ And the reason I wasn’t with Cass and Mary when they came to get you was that….”   
When she didn’t continue, Sam gently prompted, “What, Cricket?”   
“Because I was starting to feel the same way I did the morning Dean had to put me in Meadowview.”   
Both boys felt guilt go through their hearts like splinters. Evy had spent nearly a year in a mental hospital when she was eighteen after Sam had supposedly died. Both Sam and Dean had tried to watch for signs of her slipping again, but it hadn’t happened. They both cringed at the thought of what one of them would be dealing with if Billie had taken the other one on the bridge. Evy seemed to read their thoughts, because she answered the question for them.  
“And I’m gonna tell you something. Just because I understand why you made the deal you did, doesn’t make it okay. And I’m telling you that if Billie had taken one of you tonight, I would have taken care of the other one.” Evy let a dramatic pause pass at the look of shock on Sam and Dean’s face. Even Mary and Cass appeared speechless at her pronouncement. “I don’t care what’s happening, where you are or what you’re doing. If you two make a deal to give up your lives again, you better both do it. Or I will. Got it?”   
Sam and Dean both nodded, too shocked to say anything else. Evy stalked off down the hall and towards her bed, tears falling down at the thought of how close she’d been to losing either of them. She fell into a fitful sleep, still crying. She woke up when Sam came in a few minutes later, but didn’t open her eyes. She could tell he was staring at her, watching her sleep. She could almost see the look of guilt on his face. Her anger melted a little when Sam leaned over and kissed her and said the words she’d desperately wanted to hear for six long weeks.  
“Good night, Cricket. Sammy loves you.”


	26. 25 Years Old

Evy walked into the kitchen in a daze. She felt miserable. She had a headache, couldn’t breathe, and was almost certain she had a fever. She felt hot and cold at the same time. She walked over to Sam, who was doing research on his laptop, and laid her head on his shoulder.  
“Hey.” He said. “You okay?”   
“I don’t feel so good, Sammy.” She said.  
“Come here, let me see.” Sam turned around and put a hand to her forehead. He felt her cheek and immediately went into what Evy called “mama bear mode”. “God, you’re burning up.”   
“I figured.” Evy said.   
“Dean!” Sam called.   
“Not so loud, please!” Evy said. “My head’s killing me.”   
“Sorry.” Sam said as Dean made it to the kitchen.  
“What’s up?” Dean asked.  
“She’s sick.” Sam told him. “Really sick. Feel her forehead.”   
When Dean did, he looked almost more concerned than Sam did. “What are you even doing out of bed right now?” he asked. “Come on.”   
“Guys, come on. Don’t treat me like a baby, please!” Evy asked.  
“Can’t help it, Cricket.” Sam said. He stood up and grabbed her arm to lead her back to her room. “You’re our baby and we’re gonna take care of you until you get better. And there’s nothing you can do about it. Okay?”  
“Alright.” Evy answered, defeated.   
When Sam had gotten her back in her room and back in bed, he tucked her in like he’d done when she was little. He leaned over her and said,   
“Dean’s gonna be right here, okay? You go back to sleep.”   
“Where you going?” Evy asked.  
“To town. Get you some NyQuil and some chicken soup. I won’t be long, I promise.” Sam said.  
Evy smiled. “Okay, Sammy. Love you.”   
Sam kissed her forehead and brushed her hair back. He was trying to hide how worried he actually was. When he’d touched Evy’s forehead, it had felt like she was on fire. But hopefully the medicine, soup, and rest would help. He didn’t want to take her to the ER unless it became absolutely necessary. So he just smiled back at her and replied,  
“I love you too, Cricket. Everything’s gonna be okay.”


End file.
